Today I realized I think I've finally gotten all the crap out of my system. I don't have the cravings. Sure, I'd like to eat some things, but I don't crave them. And, I can resist a lot more than I thought I could. Take lunch today for example. Wendy B. and I went to Cinco. It's a fabulous Mexican restaurant that is not the normal Mexican restaurant fare. It doesn't have a Speedy Gonzalez, or a lunch special #2. It's fresh food. I really like it. They also have the best chipotle style salsa. It's smokey and good. I typically would dive in head first with as many chips as I could stand. Today, they brought the chips; they set them right in front of me; Wendy ate them, and I didn't. I wasn't even staring at them. I couldn't have cared less. Really. Really? Yes, really. I typically order this great salad there but I was afraid the dressing would have sugar in it because it's some sort of mango dressing. So, I settled for chicken fajitas....my new going out go-to. I asked them to just bring the fajitas and guacamole and nothing else. No cheese, no lettuce, no sour cream, no rice, no beans, no tortillas...just the chicken and onions please. They were delicious.
After lunch we walked over to Parson's, a nice little gift shop. Not only does Parson's have gifts, jewelry, Vera Bradley, etc., but they also have fudge, truffles, and other yummy things in their front display case. I saw it all and I was ok. I didn't start to shake or focus on them, I was perfectly fine. Could this be true? Could after 24 days of cleansing my body of the sugar and processed crap really cause me to stop being slave to them? I hope so, I really do. I have to admit though, it makes me really nervous. I have 5 more official days of this thing including tomorrow (8 days until I'm going to cheat) and I'm really scared to cheat. I feel like I will be like a drug addict and not be able to stop again. I remember when I went Vegan for 6 months. During that time, I also gave up refined sugar. When I started, I had only intended to do it for a couple of weeks, but then I was scared to cheat and backslide, so I just kept going. The turning point happened while Marcus and I were in Breckenridge. It might have been the altitude, but one day after skiing we were walking around town and I smelled the most delicious cookies I had ever smelled. We were on the street and I could smell them outside. I stopped right then and there and told Marcus I wanted a cookie. He looked at me puzzled and said "you do?" I did. I really did. In my head in that instant I thought I could isolate the event to the one cookie and go back to no processed sugar. WRONG! First of all, the cookie was delicious (I can still remember it). Second of all, after I had it, even though I got a little sick to my stomach from all the sugar, I just wanted more. I started thinking of all the things I could eat. That night we went to this place where they had fried Twinkies and make your own Smores. I got the Smores. It was like it was a downhill spiral from that point on. Next thing you knew I was back on the pizza and cheese dip too. This Paleo thing is the first serious eating plan I've done since being Vegan. I'm so very scared of what I might do after I cheat. Can I limit it to one day a week?? EEK!! I'm going to be positive and confident here and say that I can. I mean, I have not really cheated in almost a month....surely I can make it 7 days at a time, surely.
Tonight, Marcus and I had Mom and Dad over for dinner. We grilled flank steak with this awesome homemade Brazilian rub. As a side we had homemade baked sweet potato fries. We also had a nice salad with tomatoes, onions, cucumbers, and basil tossed in olive oil and balsamic vinegar. I was quite pleased with how everything turned out. I even set the table and used place mats and cloth napkins that we had received as wedding gifts. I had to cut the price tags off of them. Mom came in and said everything looked so nice but noticed there was no bread of any kind. To be honest, I hadn't even thought about it. I didn't think we were missing anything. I have gotten so accustomed to just having meat and vegetables and fruit, the bread didn't cross my mind. Nonetheless, I think everyone enjoyed it. Dad had seconds. Usually, I can tell if what I made was a fail by Dad, but he seemed to like it. Mom didn't have seconds but she told us later she'd had almost a whole box of crackers before she came. Why didn't I get more of her genes??? After dinner, I had a banana and almond butter for dessert and quite enjoyed it.
So, all in all, a pretty successful day. Oh! I forgot to tell you, I'm down 4.2 lbs. I'm really hoping to break the 5 mark and keep it there when this is all said and done. And, I wore my Miss Me jeans again today and they were even looser on me. Tomorrow, Wendy and I are off to ride 3 gap. That should deplete some of my calories :-)
Until tomorrow...
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