Well, it's here. I've hit a wall. Yesterday was a tough day. I had cravings, but worse than the cravings, I had dreadings. I dreaded eating this caveman diet food. I may have mentioned that I was vegan for 6 months. The reason I was good for 6 months is because I really don't care that much for meat. Sure, I love a good Filet cooked medium rare, but I never really crave meat (except for maybe Dreamland Barbecue). Also, I eat meat when I'm out, but rarely do I cook meat at home. I think it is disgusting. I hate handling raw meat. I hate seeing the "before". It makes me nauseous. Yesterday, I decided to do something I've never done and cook a Boston Butt. I probably should have been deterred by the name of the meat. Again, I like some good pulled pork, so I thought this would be a win. Besides, it was a crockpot recipe so it couldn't be that hard. I prepared the meat to go in the pot, which wasn't terrible. It cooked for 8 hours and I came home ready to dig in. I opened up the pot and saw all of the grease and immediately gagged. Then I had to get the meat of the bone and remove the skin and fat. Pretty sure I threw up in my mouth a little. Marcus came home in the middle of this process and asked what was wrong. I told him I couldn't handle the meat. I tried a piece, and honestly it wasn't bad, but I couldn't take it after the handling of the meat. I tried to mix it with this Bone Sucking sauce I got that was supposed to be Paleo friendly, but ate about 3 bites and couldn't eat anymore. I settled for a dry sweet potato for dinner. I had gotten to that point again of choosing not to eat instead of eating the food I was supposed to. Marcus on the other hand had a full serving of the pork and said it was good. I told him I was glad he liked it because there were 2 more pounds waiting for him. I've decided that I can eat it if I don't prepare it. This could pose a problem for the next 24 days. I'm hoping I can pay Tracy to handle my meat for me...
Not only did I mess up my dinner, but that meat was supposed to be for the whole week. Now it was 9:00 on a Sunday night and I didn't have meals prepared. Oh dear. I didn't fret too much and went to bed. This morning I woke up and had my eggs. Surprisingly, (knock on wood), the eggs haven't made me gag yet. Don't worry....they will. Lunch came quickly and I wasn't famished but I didn't pack my lunch because I couldn't eat my pork. Stacy and I went out to Frontera where I gladly let them prepare me some chicken fajitas. They were delicious and I didn't feel deprived not eating the chips and salsa. Now, that's a win. This afternoon Wendy and I met to run and swim. I was definitely lacking energy and peanut butter. By the time we finished swimming at 8:00, I was starving and I had nothing quick for dinner. I hit Publix to grab some chicken breasts, but opted for Boar's Head turkey breast and guacamole from the deli. Dinner of champions. When I walked in the house I got a familiar smell of delicious Kashi frozen pizza. I'm pretty sure Marcus stuffed what was left in his mouth as soon as I walked in to hide the fact that he was eating something delicious. We usually share the pizza, so eating the whole thing was a feat for him. He said he wanted to get rid of the temptation before I got home. How thoughtful.
After my turkey and guacamole, I wasn't quite satisfied. I opened the fridge to find Vanilla Unsweetened Almond Milk. Finally! Something I can have! No sugar! No dairy! I wanted to chug it from the carton, but Marcus really frowns upon that. I still can't figure that one out. He'll kiss me and drink after me in a cup, but won't let me indulge myself by drinking out of the carton of milk. Weird. For those milk drinkers out there, you know there is nothing better than drinking out of the carton. It's like 10 times better. But, I respected his wishes and poured a glass. It tasted so good! A week ago I couldn't get enough of a Chick-fil-A milkshake, today I'm going nuts for a glass of unsweetened milked almonds. This can't be healthy.
I haven't exactly prepared my food for tomorrow but I'm going to wing it and see what happens. Hopefully, my meat phobia will pass and I can try out the almond flour battered chicken tomorrow. Mmmmm....can't wait!
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